Do not judge your fellow until you have come to stand in their place. (Mishnah Avot 2:4)
This teaching from Hillel, one of the first leaders of Rabbinic Judaism, is one of many incarnations of the popular aphorism not to ‘judge someone until you’ve walked in their shoes.’ The interesting distinction here is that for Hillel, he is not discussing walking in someone’s shoes (ie. taking the same journey they did) but rather standing where someone else has stood.
The difference is significant- it is a matter of perspective- to judge someone you have to be able to see what they see from the place that they stand. Walking the same path others have isn't itself enough to guarantee understanding- you also have to be standing in the same place, looking at the same view, facing the same way.
When we struggle to understand eachother it's not because we walk different paths, but because we're looking at different things. A modern sage, Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, gave a lovely application of this principle in the classic 'The Little Prince': "Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction."
Whether for love, work, or simply trying to understand eachother human-to-human, we need to remember the difference between walking in eachother's shoes versus looking at the same view. As usual, it's a matter of perspective.
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